Craving Cookies


Earlier I had this sudden craving for cookies, yes choc chip cookies! I shared my craving with my bro and he was unimpressed. I then went into a dreamland where I could suddenly stroll into M&S and get two freshly baked cookies from their bakery section.

I wanted it all! I wanted the M&S, Millies, and any other brand that dealt in fresh baked cookies as opposed to the Chips Ahoy and Maryland malarky!

That’ll be the perfect snack right now, if only these places were on stand by 24hrs a day! Furthermore why aren’t these cookie cutters open 24hrs a day!? Do you know how much business you’re currently missing out on!?

I’d call up like:

“Haaalllo I’d like a big box of the freshest baked cookies in all the badaman flavoroonies under the stars: choc chip, cherry, vanilla, lemon, strawberry, kush, errrry-damn-thaaaang! And yea I’ll never get through the box whilst they’re fresh so I’ll have to refrigerate or freeze them just so I can’t look back on the whole situation and be like: I purchased a box of cookies on a craven impulsive whim and I only ate 1% worth like the twat the you are, so now when I think about the twat that you are, me eating the cookie out of the million katrilkion godzillion is gonn put me in the same twat stick group of undesirables as you. How fucking lame, how bluhhhty lame”.

Anywho next time I’m in Charing X or Ldn Brg I’m going to Millie’s cookie kioskle and I’m going to pay their fucked up extortionate £1.5m per cookie fee. *there’s goes the lottery win.

I guess there’s no price on taste.



One thought on “Craving Cookies

  1. I’ve been craving cookies too! In fact, I made some for my husband last night but I can’t eat them because I am nursing and my baby can’t tolerate any of the foods I like. :/ However, I did find that a ripe, sweet pear substituted for that craving. Normally I wouldn’t have made the switch but when you are desperate, you make things work. haha Maybe this new restricted diet will work for me and my family. According to this Mom’s Guide ( tooth decay is one of the most common illnesses among children. Maybe more pears and less choc chip cookies will help my boys get fewer cavities…


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